Become a Great Public Speaker

Referring back to lesson 4 about active listening and critical thinking, you learned that as you increase in those abilities and skills you will be better at discerning credible speeches and those that are not.

As a public speaker you have the responsibility to make sure that the information you use and provide is credible. This is where Ethics comes into the picture.

Ethics in public speaking refers to the moral conduct and responsibility we have in what we do and say.

As an "ethical" speaker, you get to take responsibility for the information and the words you use in your speech.

REMEMBER: EVERYTHING ON THE INTERNET IS NOT TRUE.

Often you will need to decide if information is credible or not by using critical thinking skills and logic. If something sounds to good to be true, it probably is. 

Your ethical conduct is a direct reflection of your personal values. This holds true for all your audience as well so it is important to construct your speech with your and the audiences values in mind (see Lesson 2 in reference to understanding your audience).

There is a balance of free speech and there are responsibilities that accompany it. Ideas are to be challenged, inspected, dismantled and re-evaluated.  People, on the other hand, are to be treated with respect, even when we disagree.

To understand more about values that are important to people, Milton Rokeach, a prominent psychologist, identified thirty-six values that are important to most people. You can link to it here:
http://www.mio-ecsde.org/protarea/Annex_4_3_values_lists.pdf

An ethical speaker will avoid speech that provokes people to violence, is hurtful to others reputation, or invades someone's privacy.

Believe me when I say that there are times that it would be satisfying at some level to be what I term as "brutally honest." This of course is in theory only, as I am sure I would feel bad when I tell the guy next to me at my daughters soccer game to shut up because he sounds like a bumbling idiot (well maybe I wouldn't feel that bad although I might get punched).

Sometimes you may have an urge to "exaggerate" or "distort" the truth some to make your speech more exciting. Don't do it. Just find a better, more creative way of expressing your point. A stretched, exaggerated, or half truth is nothing more than a lie. I compare that to someone saying they are "kind of pregnant" or "half pregnant." That doesn't work, you are either pregnant or you are not.

A good speech is one that contributes to the audience in a positive way. That's not to say that a speech must be exactly what the audience wants; it can allow the audience to question their assumptions or beliefs on a given topic, clarify a topic that has been misrepresented, or provide another view point.

The key in expressing these "alternative" positives is how you convey the message. Public speaking is learning to master the art of language.

Good ground rules for ethical speaking include what I learned from the Boy Scout law. I have added to each word with how it applies to public speaking.

A Scout/Public Speaker is:

trustworthy- speak the truth
loyal- be steadfast in doing what's right
helpful- helping your audience have a "meaningful" experience
friendly- smile be an enjoyable presenter
courteous- show respect for others beliefs, values, and opinions
kind- be friendly, generous, and considerate
obedient- do what you're going to say you're going to do
cheerful- be someone that makes others feel better
thrifty- Be resourceful
brave- It takes courage to speak in front of others
clean- Dress nice and always use clean language
and reverent- show respect for rights and responsibilities that come with Free Speech

Give credit where credit is due.

Just like much of my material comes from my experience, Toastmasters, a variety of books (see credit tab), much of your material will come from other resources.

When giving a speech, let the audience know where the information came from (if it did come from another source). Items to include would be:

• Source type (magazine, Web site, interview)
• Author or origin of source
• Title or description of source
• Date of publication or interview

Also let the audience know if it is a direct quote or if you are paraphrasing the information.

Any time you use a fact or statistic, it is important to cite where that information came from. Make sure the site is a credible site or source (not your Uncle Joe, unless your Uncle Joe is the head of the Bureau of Labor and Statistics).

Always check the copyright laws on material/information you are using.

The "doctrine of fair use" is a nice thing to know as it permits to the limited use of copyrighted works without permission for the purposes of scholarship, criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, and research.

For more information on copyright you can visit the U.S. Copyright Office.

Question

1. How does the use of cited material help bring credibility to your speech?
2. Why would you want to make sure that what you are saying is true (not a half truth or exaggerated truth)? Is there ever a time that it is okay to lie while speaking to others? Think about this one. What if your wife/girlfriend/friend asks you if she looks fat in the dress she is wearing, and she does.
3. What will (or does) make you a great public speaker? What "Boy Scout laws" are your strength and why?

Being a great listener is just as important as being a great speaker (maybe even more). In the world of public speaking, if you don't have anyone that will listen to you then you have no reason to speak. Listening and speaking go hand in hand (or maybe ear to ear).

IMPORTANT TO KNOW: A skilled listener will always be a better speaker.

Active Listening is PURPOSEFUL LISTENING that will allow you to RECOGNIZE, UNDERSTAND, and ACCURATELY understand what is being said by others.

Each audience member listening to the same speaker is not going to pick up on the same message exactly as everyone else because we all use a process known as selective perception to gather information.

With selective perception:

• We pay attention to what we feel is important. If it's important to you, you will pay attention. Of course, we don't all think the same things are important.
• We pay attention to information that we can relate to through personal experiences and our background.
• We sort and filter new information by connecting it to information we already know. This is a great "conscious" strategy you can use with new information you must remember; just link it something you already know. You can do this to remember names. Here's a good video that demonstrates this (in a funny way).

Czech Officials Fighting

The best way to learn Active Listening is to first understand what gets in the way of Active Listening.

Distractions: External, Internal, and Other Barriers to Listening

Squirrels are distracting

An External Distractions is anything in the outside environment that is competing against the speaker. It can be a noisy fan, a radio, a baby crying, a shiny object, a pretty lady, a good looking guy, a stinky smell, a squirrel, or whatever takes attention away from what is being said.

There is some control over these distractions and we'll get to that in a bit.

Internal Distractions is what is going on inside. This can be a worrisome thought, an excited feeling, a sickness, stomach issues, bad gas (creates external distraction), anxiety, or anything that you are thinking or feeling that takes your attention away from what is being said.

C'mon 9th Floor, Get There

From personal experience the hardest internal distraction when it comes to listening is when I hear something that sparks a memory or thought and my mind then drifts to that event. We all do this when we listen and even when we are reading. There's a good chance when you read "bad gas" you had a memory of some unpleasant odor that was released (either by you or someone nearby) that created a lasting impression. For that brief moment, you were distracted.

Other barriers in active listening include scriptwriting listening, defensive listening, laziness, overconfidence, and cultural differences.

Scriptwriter listening is when you are more focused on what the speaker is going to say next rather than what is being said now.

Defensive listening occurs when you decide (usually prematurely) that you don't like what is being or will be said (goes against your values or is challenging a belief or opinion). Here's great example of this occurring in politics.
Fedex Commercial

Laziness is another barrier. You are too lazy in your attitude to put forth an effort to actively listen.

A close cousin to laziness is overconfidence. You have decided that you already know (or know more) than the speaker. Rarely do we know as much as we think we know.
(This does not apply to me because I know everything I need to know except for the things I don't know that I will know when I finally know them)

Finally there are cultural differences that get in the way of active listening. A great example of that was my statement above about me knowing everything except for what I don't know…etc. If you don't know me personally, this may seem like a dumb statement. Those that do know me may understand that it's my dumb sense of humor. Those from another country, may not understand the statement at all. Often we use "slang" words and phrases that may only be understood within other culturals. In the South (United States) they often use the word "fixin" as some kind of decision, like "I'm fixin to go to the store." Where I come from, I add a "g" to the end of that word and use it differently, such as, "I'm fixing my bike tire that has a hole in it."

Hopefully I haven't confused you and made you "dumber than a bag of hammers." (Figure that one out)

Now the good stuff.

How to Become a Great Active Listener

Control the distractions that you can control. You may have some control over external distractions by preparing ahead of time. Get to the speaking event early so you can be close and not be bothered by others around or in front of you.

Control your inner distractions by consciously preparing for the speaking event.

• Set listening goals- what you want to get out of the speech.
• Listen for main ideas (and write them down).
• See if you can pick up on the organizational patterns of the speaker.
• See if you can pick up on the speakers nonverbal cues.
• Take notes on those ideas, concepts, or delivery method that you liked or didn't like.

*A Note on Note Taking
There are many different styles to note taking. Find/experiment with what works best for you. Depending on the speaker and YOUR purpose, the note taking may change. One thing I discourage is writing in full sentences because it just takes too long. I personally like to use the 2 column method. I put a line down the middle of my paper and on the left side I write down anything I feel is important that the speaker says. On the right side I right down how it applies or is important to me (this is sometimes done after the speech).

The great thing about Active Listening is it make you a better critical thinker. In the world of business, critical thinking is highly sought after because those that posses good critical thinking skills can evaluate claims on the basis of well-supported reasons.

An increase of critical thinking ability allows you to discern between a speech that is valid and credible and one that is not.

Active listening and critical thinking are used together. When you use critical thinking you can learn to:

• Evaluate the evidence used as accurate or not.
• Assess an argument's logic (Is it solid logic based on facts or fiction?).
• Resist the trap of believing everything you hear, especially if it's from a "perceived" credible source. It's okay to question and challenge an argument.
• Consider multiple perspectives. 

REMEMBER THIS- YOUR TRUTH IS BASED OFF YOUR PERCEPTION, AND YOUR PERCEPTION CAN CHANGE.

Active Listeners are Better at Evaluating Others

Often in the realm of public speaking you will be called upon to evaluate others. Because your are more aware of what is being said and how it is being said, you become a better at evaluating someone.

Keep this in mind when you are evaluating others.

• Have a plan to evaluate. Have some kind of score card or rubric to evaluate from if possible (see Evaluation Form Examples).
• Understand the level of experience of the speaker you are evaluating. A good speech for a novice is different than a good speech of someone who has been professionally speaking. 
• Be honest in your evaluation. Remember that you are evaluating from your experience and what you believe to be good or bad. Just be honest and fair.
• Find positives to evaluate as well as some areas of improvement.
• Separate the speech from the speaker. You may or may not like the individual giving the speech. Focus on the speech rather than the individual.
• Give feedback that can be used. Often I see evaluations that say "You did a great job." Well that doesn't help. You need to explain how and/or why they did a great job. BE SPECIFIC.

In conclusion, I would say that becoming an active listener will help you in all areas of your life. Being a good listener takes practice, lots of practice.

Questions

1. How has active listening helped you personally or professionally in your life?
2. How has the lack of active listening hurt you in your personal or professional life?
3. Why is critical thinking so important to you? How can increasing your critical thinking skills help you get what you want in life?
4. Think back to the statement, "Your truth is based off your perception and your perception can change." What does that mean to you and how does it affect your listening skills?

Everyone gets nervous their first time in front of a big audience, and many get nervous after their hundredth time in front of an audience.

Armpit Taco

The fact is, we all experience the emotion of anxiety, and we all experience it differently (like getting sweating armpits that soak through your shirt (aka Armpit Tacos).

The purpose of this lesson is to help you understand public speaking anxiety and what you can do to lessen those "jitters."

PSA (public speaking anxiety)
Yes that is a real term (at least in textbooks). By definition it is "fear or anxiety associated with either actual or anticipated communication to and audience as a speaker."

Experts have identified some potential causes of PSA. They are:
No experience in public speaking.
Having had a negative experience when giving a speech.
The feeling of being different from the audience.
Being the "center of attention."

Solutions to your anxiety

Everyone experiences anxiety differently and at different times throughout the speechmaking process. As you become more comfortable and advanced in your public speaking abilities, your anxiety(s) will also change.

Number one solution to control your anxiety in public speaking is…to always be prepared. Of course that is a good rule for anything you are doing in life-BE PREPARED.

How to BE PREPARED

• Research. Know your topic, your audience, the environment you will be presenting in, etc. (See Lesson 2)

• Practice. Repetition is the mother of skill and the more you practice giving your speech (in front of a mirror, in front of family/friends, in an empty classroom) the better you will be. 

• Expect Anxiety. Yes, you need to expect that you will have some butterflies. It's better to expect this feeling than try to deny it. Some feel anxiety before the speech (during preparation), some feel anxiety during the speech, and some will feel anxiety before and during. It's okay, it's expected.

• Visualize. Yes this actually works and can help you while you are practicing. Close your eyes while you are practicing your speech. I have used this technique with numerous students and many have commented that it helped considerably. 

Other Solutions to Speaker Anxiety

Fake it Until You Make It. This saying has stuck with me since I was a young buck in college. I was stressed out that I wasn't going retain everything from all of my studies. One of my professors told me that sometimes in life I will need to fake it til' I make it, in other words, be confident and act like I knew what I was doing until I did know what I was doing. Hey, it worked, and it still works to this day.
**This is not good advice for doctors and those who are in the profession of saving lives.**

Be Positive. Having good "positive" thoughts about speaking will relieve your stress. Have you ever heard the saying "Attitude is Everything!"? Well it's another one of those cliches that are true.

Create a Checklist. Some people feel better when they have a checklist to check off, such as

• Appropriate topic selected.
• Researched information for topic.
• Audience researched.
• Outline completed.
• Practiced in front of mirror.
• Visualized the speech.
• Timed my speech (Time was_______).
• Checked out all audio/visual equipment.

Learn to Meditate. I'm a personal fan of Dr. Wayne Dyer and his book/CD on relaxation called "Getting in the Gap."


Relaxation Breathing. Inhale slowly through your nose and let your abdomen fill up (your belly not your chest). Hold it in for five seconds and imagine little oxygen cells cleaning out your body. Exhale slowly while imagining all that anxiety leaving your body in a black cloud. Feel yourself being cleansed from the inside out.

Move Around. You can control anxiety by moving around when you talk. Make sure these are natural and "non-distracting" movements. You might just want to video yourself speaking to see what your body movements are.

You Get to Speak. Choosing to, or getting to speak is much more relaxing than having to speak. Enjoy the opportunity that you "get to" speak.

Dress for Success. It is a fact that your dress changes how you act. Dress nice, comb your hair (get a haircut), ladies get your hair and nails done (yep, I just gave you an excuse) and there is a good chance you will feel better. Oh yeah, wear clothing that will not show perspiration (Armpit Tacos).

Drink Water. It is acceptable to have bottled water when you speak (it will help with dry mouth). It is looked down upon to have anything else to drink. Your 64 oz Big Chill mug is not "cool" (actually, it's never cool looking in any setting). Your Starbucks Grande Machachino Whatever is also not considered professional. Coffee is casual not professional.

Finally, evaluate yourself appropriately. Don't be hard on yourself. List all the positives that you did during your speech and then list all the areas you "get to" improve on. It is "highly recommended" to always list more things you did well than those things you want to improve on. I recommend a 2:1 ratio- two positives for every one area of improvement.

Questions

1. What are some other techniques that you use to help with anxiety?
2. Describe a time that you felt confident in an activity you were doing. How did you feel, what did you do to prepare, and how can you recreate that feeling when you are going to give a speech?
3. What is your biggest fear in public speaking and how can you overcome it?

• What am I passionate about? 
• What inspires me? 
• What is something that I am good at? 
• What is unique about me? 
• What is a good story about me? 
• What is controversial? 
• What is a hobby of mine? 
• If I could be doing anything right now, what would it be and why?

The “what, why, and how” statements are always good for starting the thought process. One of my sayings is, “Ask a better question, and you get a better answer.” This applies to so many problems in life, including finding a topic to speak on. There is a book that I highly recommend that deals with asking yourself good questions, it’s called The Question behind the Question. This is a book I have included in my resource library.